I've discovered that I'm probably a horrible person.
It all started when a coworker of mine bounded to her desk after lunch and blurted "operation bunny rescue complete". I am not typically responsive to blatant bait, so she had to repeat herself prefaced with a "didn't you hear me"? I turn around to face her while she explains that she was standing outside the office building and witnessed a magpie drop a baby bunny from the sky. The magpie then swooped down to peck and claw at the bunny. She is animated and aghast while I am waiting for something shocking. She shooed the magpie away (now I'm starting to be shocked) picked up the baby bunny (wuh?!) and put in under a bush. The bunny couldn't move, just trembled in shock. These events took place on her morning break and she decided at that time that if the baby bunny was still there at lunch she'd take action.
So here we are, it's after lunch, I already have issues with what she's told me and there's still more.
She went out and the baby bunny hadn't moved. She got a box, put the baby bunny in the box, I presume she got creature comforts like grass, water...a lounge chair....I dunno. She takes the box to her car, in an uncovered lot on a hot day, and leaves baby bunny in her car for 5 hours. She's sharing this with me waiting for my shock at what she's witnessed and my praise for her efforts. I'm a good government employee though, and I understand the game of political correctness.
Luckily she knows me. She's someone that I consider a good friend, so once we were away from the office I start mouthing off. Here is my opinion on her animal rescue.
What the FUCK!? First of all it's nature! People do realize that animals eat fuckin' animals....right? Like please tell me you don't think that magpie or grizzly require the same grain fed politically correct meat that YOU eat!! That baby bunny is food. I don't care if you're a Vegan or a Vegetarian or a Raw Food-ist. Your lifestyle choice is yours and yours alone. You cannot and should not assume that your opinions carry over to the animal kingdom.
You have seen nature programs right? Just so you know, animals killing animals is not restricted to the jungles, forests or savannas. It happens in backyards, alleyways and apparently in front of remote office towers. It's normal and natural. How do people think a magpie will kill something? Humanely? It's got the ability to drop something from extreme height, it's got claws and a beak. So when I think of a magpie killing something it's pretty graphic. The bunny could not and would not move for hours because even the bunny knows it is food! It's body went into shock, which is a built in reaction for prey. It's nature's throw back to humanity. Just so we all feel good about killing nature built "shock" into creatures so that we humans (FYI the ONLY creature on the planet that gives a shit about being "humane"!!) could say "it didn't suffer". Snakes don't google how to kill prey in a humane manner, they do what INSTINCT tells them and they use the resources nature gave them!! Is it wrong for a magpie to eat cute fluffy bunnies? NO, it's called a food chain you idiot. Hearken back to Disney's Lion King to which we ALL sung along. It's the damned circle of life!! You shouldn't ever, EVER interfere with the circle of life.
Now let's flip this a bit. What if the magpie (Pica pica) had a nest full of baby Pica pica somewhere? That baby bunny could have made the difference between life and death. Pica pica have average nests of 6 to 9 eggs. Once those eggs hatch the baby Pica pica cannot fly till about 3 to 4 weeks after hatching. It stands to reason that they need Mom & Dad to bring food. If you take away their meal you could save a baby bunny, but you might be killing 8 to 11 other animals.
If you know me, you know I presented this logic to my friend. Her response was "it's a MAGPIE"!
You see this coming right?
How arrogant and stupid. It's now ok to defend the cute fluffy bunny because it's cute and fluffy?! Your opinion is that the magpie is a pest and therefore it's life and the life of it's babies is worth less than a cute fluffy bunny? Really? The magpie was doing what is right in this world. Interfering with the magpie is what is wrong in the world. It's very clear when I look around at humanity that her opinion is rampant. There it is, right out there in society. We rescue bunnies because they are fluffy....even at the expense of other non-fluffy creatures.
When the human race and it's opinions about nature are long gone I hope the magpie is around and I hope it's happily dropping fluffy bunnies from the air and pecking them to death while holding the bunny with it's sharp claws. Why? Because it's RIGHT. It's the way nature gets shit done. It's gross to you because you're stupid.
