The Day They Broke Our Door Down

Monday afternoon my daughters came home, approached the door and were about to enter the code for our keyless entry when my oldest noticed the door was already open and something was wrong. She pushed the door open to discover it had been busted down and our home was ransacked. 

In all honesty I feel extremely lucky. No one was home, no one was injured, our Maine Coon cats are just fine. The robbers didn't take anything that couldn't be carried easily. Meaning we still have the very expensive items that didn't fit in a backpack. They took all my valuable jewels. There was no real vandalism or trashing of my home that couldn't be repaired with a little effort. Oh, except the front door which was effectively destroyed and took more than 10 man hours to repair. Kudos to my Manthingy and his dear friend Sean. 

I don't want to talk about those things though. I have to get the mental shit out of my head. I have to see this in writing instead of chasing it in circles around my brain. 

Let's get the obvious out of the way right now. If someone breaks into your home it leaves you feeling violated. It doesn't matter if they come in when your home or not, if they trash the entire place or simply count coup on you. It's certainly arguable that there are different levels of violation; I don't wish to delve into that though. I want to very broadly state that no matter what the case is it is a violation. Due to the feeling of violation you will lose sleep. 

I slept fine the first night. In fact, I slept so well it was eerie. He was up all night that first night; restless sleep, bolting upright at any sound, tossing and turning. He was a wreck in the morning and I was all beautifully rested. 

The second night, last night, was my torture. So here I am trying to get it all out. I need to sort my thoughts. Stack them nicely, watch them topple over. Arrange them according to size, then scramble them all up again. I know it's futile because no matter how I sort them or arrange them I won't grasp the concept or the reasoning. I have to get it out of my head and onto paper though, it's a quirk I have. 

I can fathom that this person/people may be someone we know. The person may even be able to read this. I don't know if it was one person or more than one. I don't know the gender or age. It could have been anyone. 

Whoever it was, they wanted into my home so much that they chose the most difficult entrance. The got through my deadbolt. Didn't break the window in my door, didn't break any windows. The person just pried it open, the dead bolt wasn't disturbed. My neighbor came over and had to push the dead bolt back into the door so he could close it and keep our cats and home warm. I went looking on-line for ways to deter robbers and always in the top ten are things like a deadbolt (which we had), motion lights (which we have), doors and windows locked (they were), mail and newspapers not piled up (they weren't), lights on timers (got 'em), "beware of dog" sign even if you don't have one (got that too), alarm company stickers in the windows (previous owners DID have an alarm system). It's not like we were an easy target other than we weren't home! 

With all that being said, what restores a feeling of security? Time? Do we eventually forget the rawness? An alarm system would not have prevented this. Alarm systems do not prevent people who really want in. I'm not saying it won't deter most thieves, I'm saying that if they want in bad enough they'll get in. My question is still unanswered though. In the past 40 hours we've looked at Mantraps, security cameras, biometric locks, locks of every variety for every point of entry. Mantraps are by far the most fun. We've replaced our door and made a few modifications to aide the illusion of security. 

I understand dogs now. No, not in a "I've lost my mind and now I hear what dogs are saying to us" manner. I understand why people have them. I understand why people walk their dogs, pick up the dog shit and keep dogs that chew the shit out of things. I get it now. Dog is man's best friend. They hear what man can't, sound the alarm when something is wrong, the right dog can be intimidating. It's an exchange....the dog cares for you and you care for the dog. Now listen, I'm not daft. My family had dogs my ENTIRE life. I looooooooooved dogs. I loved having a dog around and I remember it vividly. Some of you will understand this while many of you don't. I had my heart broken by a dog. We'll call him a dog because essentially he filled the role. He wasn't a dog though, he is irreplaceable and he ruined me for dogs. He was 100% purebred Timberwolf. I know right? It's true though. The police confirmed it and the story is quite spectacular......until it ends with broken hearts and a dead wolf. Every dog seems stupid now. I know it's harsh and I don't mean to offend you. A Timberwolf will outmatch and outwit your dog any day. It's physical capabilities are off the charts. We had someone break in to our house when I was about 6 and not one of us ever lost a nights sleep. Smokey didn't bark to alert us or the intruder. He waited silently on the other side of our back door. I don't know what the intruder thought when he was greeted by Smokey. All we found was blood, a trail of blood leading to the corner and then it stopped. Smokey didn't disturb our slumber and no one lost sleep after the break-in. He was not a dog and since Smokey died I've never bonded with another animal. This is the first time in the 27 years since he died that I've wanted to bond again.

The intruder took down our bedroom curtains. Didn't rip them out of the wall or harm anything. Didn't throw them across the room, but laid them carefully below the window. Why? Was the room too dark? Why expose a line of sight? You're robbing a house for christsake!! Why would you make yourself more visible? Unless you can see us from where you reside......unless you like to watch. The lights in the house were turned on, my bedroom light and lamp were on. Removing the curtain makes no sense. Had it been done destructively I wouldn't wonder....but it wasn't. 

The intruder looked through my photo albums and my diary. Ummmm....how much time did the intruder have? How did they know they had time for that? Even if they knew they had time why did they take time to do that?

There is so much of value that they didn't take....are they coming back? Never mind them coming back. What about some other criminal?! They don't know we've already been hit. People have said that once everything is brand new and replaced criminals will hit the same place 6 months later. 

End result is someone broke through my dead bolt, walked through my house, spent time sifting through my stuff, walked into my daughter's rooms and our room with no concern and no one knew. 

I understand now why my daughter hates sleeping on the main floor, all alone while we sleep upstairs. If someone were on a blood thirsty rampage she wouldn't stand a chance. She'd be dead before we were even aware of a problem. 

Yeah, I know....fantastical notions and too many scary movies. I know my situation is not bad and it could have been far worse. Tell me that at 3am when I hear a bang though.